Fiscal Footsie With Fascism: Budget Freeze Meets Constitutional Strip Tease
Maybe you've heard about Trump's Office of Management and Budget freezing ALL federal assistance and grants (if you haven't, catch up with The Big Picture's breakdown here).1
Trillions. Funding for everything from Medicaid to school lunches to research grants, all put on ice faster than a Manhattan DA's investigation. Just turning off the money spigot, kinda like the opposite of what he did with the magic water one going from Canada to California. You know the one.2
But don't worry! The OMB assures us this is just a temporary pause to check for "wokeness" and "waste." You know, like how your local mobster just wants to temporarily hold onto your business for "safekeeping."
When I first read about this unprecedented power grab (and after I finished stress-eating an entire package of Democracy Dies in Darkness™ cookies), I realized what I needed to do.
Yes, it is true. The world needs a YankoBoop. Something that captures both the constitutional crisis AND the absolute absurdity of it all.
The YankoBoop
Enter the Wag Team with "Fiscal Footsie With Fascism."
Harumph
While we're all enjoying this delightful romp through the death of democratic norms, let's remember what's actually at stake:
Medicaid funding that millions rely on
Research grants keeping our universities running
School lunch programs feeding our kids
Infrastructure projects employing thousands
That thing where we try to stop AIDS
But hey, at least someone’s owning the libs!
What You Can Do
Share this song with anyone who still thinks this is "just politics as usual"
Support Jay Kuo3 and/or The Big Picture's ongoing coverage of this crisis
Call your representatives (yes, even the ones who think the Constitution is more of a suggestion)4
Subscribe below for more bitter satire as we watch democracy play strip poker with fascism
*Special note: This song pairs well with:
A stiff drink
Your last Social Security check
That feeling when you realize "it can't happen here" is happening here*
Subscribe now to get every Yankoboop hit as we soundtrack the collapse of democratic norms! Early ubscribers get exclusive early access to our "Songs to Coup To" playlist and weekly "Dictator's Choice" tracks!
Coming up next: "Thoughts and Tariffs (Poor Jeremy's Lament)" - Because nothing says MAGA like freezing your own benefits!
The Hydro-Delusional Blues
In this installment of Mixtape on the Titanic: While Los Angeles battles actual fire-hurricanes, we explore the mysterious case of Canada's largest (and most fictional) plumbing fixture. As Jeff Tiedrich documents in his masterful breakdown of hydrological hysteria, we've reached that special moment when climate disaster meets imaginary infrastructure.
https://www.govtrack.us/congress/members/current